Friday, December 18, 2015

The Rebel Force has awakened in me

Momma's Log December 18, 2015 (Kwrp)


No, I have not seen the newest Star Wars movie(but boy, I can't wait to)--so, don't worry--no spoilers here.  But, today has been all about rebellion for me.   Normally, I go about my business as usual, don't rock the boat, and try to do and be my best.  It all started with yesterday.  Yesterday I finished my Christmas shopping.  Yep. I know.  Hold your applause.  Because, you see--it awakened something in me.  Maybe it's all the stress of trying to make sure I get it all finished--buying gifts (hopefully not forgetting anyone), keeping belief in Santa alive for my boys, playing the part of an elf as I order and shop for all the items that they asked Santa for when we visited him at the North Pole (good gracious NO, we do not do that creepy, spying, naughty Elf on the Shelf!) (Sorry, that was harsh--I applaud those of you who can keep that going--it's WAY too much work for this chic!), making sure we keep our traditions in check--Christmas cards, hosting a party, baking goodies, and all the things we enjoy to make this season special.  All of the stuff to remember can make most of us bleary eyed and feel like crying.  Maybe it was just the exhale of finishing the most joyful (brutal) part of Christmas--the shopping.  (Maybe my head is not screwed on right or maybe my shoes are on too tight)



But, mostly I think something snapped in me because today is my last day of freedom.  At 1:00pm today, my boys will be finished with school until January 5th.  Today is my last day to enjoy a quiet, nobody else around, do what I want to do day.

Today I did things that I have NEVER done before. The first thing was that I wore my P.J.'s in public.  Now, it was only for a few moments, while I walked my boys from our car to the door of their school. And in my defense, it was Jammie Day for their school. I admit I have always been a little "judgy" when I see folks out and about in their jammies--it's like they're saying "you know what?  I give up! I have lost all self respect and hope, I don't care any more and getting dressed is just too much effort!" But, I have to say --to those of you who do this regularly--it was kind of nice.  I had that moment of panic--you know like when you look down to make sure you're wearing pants, but overall it was a very pleasant experience.  I always felt like I had to at least wear yoga pants or something--to maybe give the illusion that even though I was not dressed nice, I had a purpose-- like I was going to go work out or something.  But I think this whole wear my jammies all day thing might be a new way of living.  Who knows what's next?

Which leads to rebellious act #2.   I got a special holiday latte today.  Twice.  Yep!  I know.  It's a CRAZY day already and now I'm pumped full of twice as much caffeine as usual that I spent an insane amount of money on (please don't tell Super Rock Star).  Now, here's the thing.  (Whisper voice) I didn't even know this was allowed.  Seriously.  Who does this?  I made sure to go to two different places just in case, but I gotta tell you I was pretty nervous.   In fact at the second stop, I was giving the cashier the shifty eyed side look as I waited for him to swipe my card.  I fully expecting the alarms to start blaring and a loud voice booming. "Ma'am! You are exceeding  your delicious overpriced coffee limit for the day!  For the next two weeks you are banished to your cheap home made coffee with NO creamer.  Shame on you!!!" But, that didn't happen so, I slowly pulled away sipping my second fully caffeinated beverage of the day.  Oh my goodness --I'm outta control!  Thelma and Louise have nuthin me!

This leads to my 3rd rebellious act.  This is one I really struggled with.  Both my boys have class Christmas parties at school today.  It's the last day before Christmas break and it'll just be a fun day. It's Jammie day for them (see? I totally fit in when I dropped them off) and they'll get to have treats and watch movies.  In the past I have always volunteered to be there and help out.  But this year when I got the google document asking for treat donations and parent volunteers, I slyly closed the page after signing up for a treat for my son to bring and did not put my name in the (many) open slots for classroom volunteers. You see, as all teachers will tell you, the day before Christmas break is like no other.  It is the worst form of chaos ever known to man. Not only are our kids excited about it being the last day of school before Christmas break, not only are they ecstatic about getting to wear pajamas to school, but they know they will get to watch movies, they will get to play games and then you add sugary snacks and drinks into the mix and it is all out a war zone.  I've never seen anything like it: total anarchy.


And the teachers--well I'm convinced they are serving some nice "holiday punch"  in the lounge or something, because all of them are so mellow and cheerful as their entire classroom seems to be exploding with unbridled energy and loud screaming(or maybe they are just having to go inside their minds and find their happy place to escape from all of the carnage).  This year.  I can't.  I just can't do it.  Now, if they were willing to share this "holiday punch" with the parents--we might be on to something, but as of yet, it's never been offered and to go into that kind of situation with out some "grown up liquid management"--its just more than I can do.  I've seen too much.  I know too much.  Leave this for the rookies who are still enamored with the idea of being super parent of the year, or believe that Santa is watching and they want to score some extra points, or that they really are so much more mature than I am and have these good and gracious and selfless hearts that I've heard so much about.  This is not me.  I'm willing to sacrifice going on the naughty list and humbly accepting my lump of coal.  But, for you brave teachers and parents that are heading into battle today.  I salute you.  Godspeed!



This all led to my last bit of guilty indulgence.  Since I am finished with my Christmas shopping, I am seriously feeling like I'm on top of the world.   I  found myself wanting to high five perfect strangers.  I am giddy with excitement and feel both joyful and triumphant. So, I strolled.  Yes, strolled.  No more frantic driving around and running in and out of stores.  I leisurely walked into a store just to enjoy looking.  I was feeling a little smug as I saw other moms with the frantic half baked insane look in their eyes as they were searching for that one thing that little Johnny or Suzy HAS to have and every store is sold out.  I sauntered along , sipping my second extravagant coffee drink, swirling it around and sipping it like it was cognac and feeling like I needed a trumpet fanfare walking before me declaring my smashing victory over conquering my Christmas list. At the very least a victory tunnel of folks leading out to my car giving me low fives and chanting my name would have been a nice finish to the day.

For those of you wearing real clothes and not knowing the joy of wearing your jammies in public, for those of you surviving on home made, pre-ground, no fun stuff in it coffee, for those of you in the midst of volunteering at your child's last day before break party, for those of you in the thick of finishing your Christmas shopping lists--your time is coming, You're almost there. And you can count on me to be in the live for your victory tunnel-- low fiving, high fiving and blowing a trumpet fanfare for your celebration.  Christmas is ALMOST here! Jesus was born! Santa is on his way!

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